The truth as told by liars. We swear.

Two life experts combine their advanced cognition with linguistic mastery to humerously joust over various topics. The ballad of Tricky Dick and Johnny Depth.

Friday, August 04, 2006

TOPIC: Fidel Castro

QUESTION: How has fidel Castro remained in power for so long?

ANSWERS:

Tricky Dick says:
This is a very good and baffling question. In fact, it's right up there with "How come the sky is blue", "How come the Cardinals are so shitty at football", and "How come women can't do math"........but if you're looking for an answer, good bad or indifferent, you've come to the right spot.

Have you ever had a cuban cigar? It really takes over your mind with thoughts of overwhelming motivation to do absolutely nothing......about anything. So basically I think that fidel stayed there because the country hasn't sunk yet. Minus that pesky cuban missle crisis, he probably is an alright guy. I mean, his name is Fidel, which is undoubtedly the opposite of Infidel, which by definition is someone who believes in nothing. So by the means of the Dewey Decimal System and osmosis, we can logically come to discover that Fidel must have believed in anything and EVERYTHING. He probably even believes in you.....so hang in there slugger.

__________________________________________________________________

Johnny Depth responds :

Fidel Castro... I would much rather approach the other questions presented in Tricky Dick's post.
How come the sky is blue?
It is an effect called Rayleigh scattering or you could argue that it's blue because Mr. T says so.
Why are the Cardinals so shitty at football?
The Cardinals are shitty at football, because football is a man's game; it's not for the birds.
How come women can't do math?
Women can't do math, because women don't rely on logic. They twist things until it approaches a solution they like. This approach works in relationships--not math.
men: 1man+1woman=2people
women: 1man+1woman=1couple

Back to the main question.

I think that Castro has remained in power, because the while the communism has not created prosperity, it has not been bad enough to inspire a large anti-communist movement inside Cuba. Unlike Russia, Cubans don't have deafly cold winters to survive. Maybe poverty in the Caribbean isn't so bad, because you’re in the Caribbean. Also, it is against the law to oppose the government, and freedom of speech is not a reality. The majority of people who dislike Castro got on a boat and moved to Miami.






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